Before sitting down to write this, I mentioned to Tamar that I would be writing about her father Hessie, or ‘Saba’ as he is affectionately known. The look on her face was priceless.
Tamar thought I would speak negatively about the most generous, selfless and quirkiest man I have ever known – ridiculous!
In the 25 years since I first met Hessie, I have come to respect him as much as my own father. And there are even similarities between us – perhaps more than I’d like to admit.
the man
Hessie is a ‘kibbutznick’, a name for someone who grew up on a Kibbutz in Israel. A Kibbutz is a collective community traditionally based around agriculture. Hessie and his family lived on Kibbutz Gan Shmuel, located just north of Tel Aviv, but Hessie wanted to explore a different life from his family and peers; he was the first to leave his Kibbutz. He ended up in Haifa, Israel where he studied at Teknion and became a civil engineer.
Then, while leading a tour around Israel, Hessie met his wife, my mother-in-law, Lee. I’ve seen pictures of him from back in the day and I have to be honest, I too might have swooned! He was, and still is a good-looking man. But it was likely his outgoing personality and willingness to engage in conversation that won Lee over.
NOT!
Ultimately, they met, fell in love and began a life together in Toronto, Ontario. They raised their daughters Tamar (my wife) and Mya (my sister-in-law) in the same house that they still live in today.
Hessie is a very smart, modest, and generous man. Since the birth of his four grandchildren his priorities are as evident today as they were decades ago; Hessie is all about his family.
the handshake
There are moments in life I will never forget; high school prom, my Bar mitzvah, the birth of my kids and meeting my (future) father-in-law.
I find it hard to believe that I met Hessie Rimon over 25 years ago. Actually, it’s hard to believe that I refer to anything in my life being 25 years ago because I truly don’t feel that ‘old’.
Back then, summer camp had just ended and Tamar and I were headed to Concordia University in Montreal, Quebec. Tamar’s parents were in Montreal visiting her grandmother and were headed our way to help Tamar move into her apartment.
Even though Tamar and I had only been together a short period of time, being the family oriented person that she is, she insisted I meet her parents. Two words came to mind; no, not those two words. Oy Vey!
We stood outside, in front of Tamar’s apartment building waiting for them. We waited. And we waited. Let me be clear, I hated meeting parents! Almost as much as I hated going over to a girlfriend’s house for a family dinner. But the plan was to unload the car and (HUGE SIGH) have me meet her parents, for the first time.
When they finally arrived, Tamar’s mom was first to exit the car and give me a huge, awkward …handshake. Next was Tamar’s Dad. He was slow to get out of the car, and slow to approach me. He must have been really excited to meet me! He shook my hand, and we exchanged pleasantries. I then quickly grabbed a box, took it upstairs to Tamar’s apartment, and proceeded to run as fast as I could back to the comfort of my own apartment.
Seriously, I left and ran as fast as I could!
And so began my relationship with Tamar’s parents.
25 years later I’m still not overly thrilled when going to their house for dinner. Totally kidding Lee!
the family guy
To know Hessie is to know he is about one thing and one thing only; his family. Ok, yoga might be a close second.
Every morning Hessie spends hours doing his yoga, headstands and all. He’s always been ahead of his time in regard to diet and exercise. He consumes tons of olive oil, home made tea (which can sit on his stove-top for up to a week) and fresh fruit. He’s also a big believer in fasting from time to time. As I said, he was into ‘clean eating’ long before clean eating existed.
When he and I first met, his life revolved around his daughters, Tamar and Mya. But years later, that circle has grown to include my children Jonah and Jamie, and my niece and nephew, Eryn and Shane. The four of them enjoy the most incredible relationship with their Saba.
Hessie is their friend, he is their confidant and he is their biggest fan.
Whether taking the family on vacations, picking up the grandkids from activities or massaging my daughter’s feet for hours at a time, Hessie will do whatever he can to spend time with his grandchildren.
And they absolutely love being with him.
like father (in law) like son (in law)?
What about me? Where do I fit in?
It took me years to fully appreciate this, but Hessie and I are very much alike; the love we have for our family is immeasurable. We have similar work ethics, similar diets and we both do head stands.
Hessie also has little time for BS. He keeps his thoughts to himself as he is a private man, but make no mistake, he is very calculated and perceptive.
I have earned his respect over the course of 25 years. I mean, I had a lot of making up to do after bolting immediately following ‘the handshake’! And although this is something we have never discussed, I know there is nothing he wouldn’t do for me.
This man came from very modest beginnings and worked his ass off to create an incredible life for himself, his wife, his daughters and now his grandchildren.
There is nothing that I wouldn’t do for him.
With love,
– jw
